Posts Tagged ‘race report’

Where to start?  I won’t go into detail about the FE (forum encounter) except to say these women are as smart, savvy, funny and beautiful as I imagined and as yesterday’s photos illustrate.  It was truly a special gathering of old and new friends.

Afterward brunch and expo, then Kat and Audra come back to my place since they were staying with me.  I was so glad they were there, I was able to almost forget about the race and felt in capable hands since they’ve got a lot of marathons between them.

Race morning: Up at 5:15, slug some coffee and my usual peanut butter bread w/banana  and get myself ready.  I gave my bag for bag check to the girls who offered to carry it so I wouldn’t have to deal with checking it in.

Perfect weather for a race: 44 – 51 and sunny.  I’ve got sunglasses on my head, small water bottle in my hand, socks for arm warmers (which I discard after the 1st mile) and 4 gels.

Get to the race area and slide right into my corral (advantages of living 10 minutes from the start line).  I’m feeling good, I tell myself this is my day and I believe it.  Gun goes off.

First mile 7:53 was slower than I wanted due to the crowd but I’m not worried, lots of time to make that up.  The next few miles are pretty much on 7:30 pace but I know it’s not matching my paceband (which accounted for the course elevation, so indicated faster miles here).  I decided to ignore my paceband from that point on and just listen to my body.  I wanted to try to be as non-negative as possible, though not entirely successful, ignoring the paceband helped.

Mile 8 had a meaty uphill and my pace slowed to 7:50.  Mile 9 had another hill and I handled it ok but knew I was probably slower than what the paceband would have had me do.  At this point, I just said fuck it and told myself to “run within yourself”.  I was already figuring the sub 3:17 was toast and I didn’t want to feel pressured into running badly to make it happen.   Wish I’d stuck to that.

I get out on Kelly Drive, feeling alright, then the 3:20 pace group comes up from behind moving faster than I am.  I kind of panic seeing how fast they’re going compared to me (I still thought I was in 3:20 land at this point), so I decide to hang on, though I have to speed up some to keep up.  That was a major mistake.

The pace leader, incidentally, is an RW forumite as well, Pacer Chris, though he had no idea I was there and wouldn’t have known me if he’d seen me.  Nice guy, great pace leader too.  I follow him for a couple miles and up the last real hill, Lemon Hill, and I can tell my HR is just way higher than it should be.  I hear the people around me talk and they’re very relaxed while I’m not – this is not good.  So at mile 14.5 I sadly let them go and return to running my own race.  But by now I know it’s too late, this is going to be a looooong race.

Mile 16 is 7:56 (there are no hills here, I just can’t move faster), mile 17 is 8:16.  There aren’t any spectators for this portion which makes it very easy to berate myself for realizing that while I want to be competitive in this sport, I’m really just a Giver Upper, I don’t have the “dig deep” gene that a real racer has.  I’ve always felt this though, so it’s nothing new, just good to rub it in when I’m feeling low.

Mile 18 is 8:25.  I reflect at how, for my first marathon last year, this was to be my race pace (which totally got mangled, just as this one was).  Somehow this is amusing and very sour at the same time.  At 18.75, with labored breathing and the knowledge that my effort cannot continue, I take my first walking steps.

It feels like sweet relief, my body getting itself back into a manageable machine, albeit somewhat broken.  On a strangely positive note, I’d already reached Giver Upper stage but had accepted it, so I didn”t even feel bad anymore about my lost goal, it was a done deal so what was I going to do about it?  I know I’ve totally screwed this race so all I can do is try to make it end however I can, which means I end up run/walking the rest of the entire fucking race.

Luckily, I have a Sub 3:20 thread pal’s “voice” ringing in my head, Chris, who told me to relax about PRs and just have fun, so thanks to him and Zab (who sent the sweetest good luck note, also saying “have fun”), I decided that I would not make this a multi-mile self-flogging.  I was going to enjoy what I had and smile.  The new A goal was to get a marathon PR, knowing I could crawl it in at this point – at least that was a given.

I also made a mini-goal to keep me moving, and that was to try and keep my pace no slower than 9min, so I’d walk until I needed to get the time back in order, then run a tiny bit (not even 2 minute stretches, I don’t think) then walk again.  I knew the 3:30 pace group would eventually catch up to me and was kind of hoping I wouldn’t have to see 3:40, but I was pretty much all Fuck It at this point.

I did see a couple of my Women’s BQ pals since there was a long turnaround but couldn’t yell hi back because I’d lost my voice completely, all I had left was a squeak.  So the Manayunk portion was endless but I kept smiling and managed to find some humor out of this ridiculous situation.

I ended up covering a lot more ground than 26.22 because tangents were no longer in my guidebook, I had to stick to the right side of the road so I could stay out of the other runners way.

Oh, and the bibs were funny, they had our names on them and unlike Steamtown, when someone said, “you can do it” or “woohoo,  great job” and I just wanted to punch them since I was so obviously struggling, this time I thought it was really sweet when people called my name and I waved or smiled in thanks, though kept feeling as if I’d let them down when I began walking again.

At mile 25-something I saw my girls screaming for me, Kat yelled something about where we were supposed to meet but I didn’t hear.  I was running when I passed them and wondered if they saw me start walking a bit afterwards.  They knew it was bad anyway since I was so behind at this point, but I was actually feeling pretty good, all things considered (mentally, I mean…my feet hurt and my left shin was aching).

As I neared the museum with about 1/2 mile to go, the cutest thing happened.  People were loving saying my name, maybe because it’s a funny waitress name, but as I started the last rise I started walking again (seriously, I did that shit for 8 miles) a guy yells out, “c’mon Flo, it’s just 1/4 mile to the top of the hill and you’re there” and there were tons of spectators lining the course, so I waved to the guy, wry grin on my face and started running.  Both sides of the crowd started screaming like crazy “yay Flo, wooohoo, Go Flo”, it was surreal.  I’ve always said I didn’t care about crowd support but this was something so special, I was grateful like nothing you can believe.

I made it up the rise and I’m really ready to get this party over with so I pick up the pace and of course, at this very point, I feel the Bear knocking on the door.  For my non-running friends, the Bear is when you want to shit.  I have never, not one single time, in any of my training runs experienced the Bear.  But now, when I’m just .25mi from the finish of hell-race, all I can think about is holding my damn sphincter so tight, I could have strangled a baby with my ass.  Thankfully (because that would have really been a dramatic finish with or without the baby), I kept the Bear at bay.

I came in at 3:33:59.

So I hobble to a pretzel and am actually amazed that with all that walking the time wasn’t that bad.  I’m feeling pretty good about the craziness of the situation and can’t wait to see my girls and talk about it.

But I can’t find them.  They have my clothes and my apartment keys.

I end up walking back and forth for an entire hour looking for them.   We were all so dumb for not having a plan, I guess we all figured it’d be pretty easy to find each other but there thousands of people.  At one point I went to the med tent because I was so cold and asked if I could just stand there for a bit.  I borrow the medic guy’s phone to call Nick thinking he has keys to my apartment, plus I left my phone at home so then I could call Audra or Kat and find them that way but he wasn’t answering.

I start getting really depressed and wondering what the hell to do.  I was freezing and tired of being on my feet so finally, I found a bit of curb in a middle area and sat, just hoping they’d find me.  Like an angel, Nina (one of the Women’s BQ babes) finds me and immediately calls the others like a cop would, “I’ve got her!”  She gives me her jacket and I start blubbering.  All the tension from the race and me feeling lost and helpless just spilled out.

Of course, it turns out we were all going to the same places, just a few steps behind each other so in no time at all, we’re assembled, the girls hold the space blanket around me and I change in the middle of the throng, feeling much better and warm.  We walk to a bar for the apres race gathering (thanks Caroline, you really did a stellar job of all the event planning) and have a great time rehashing.

Everyone is insanely supportive as I know you, my readers, will be.  And I was in a great mood after I’d had a Bloody Mary in me, but walking back home, the fatigue and the weight of a failed race became very heavy.  My “lemonade out of lemons” feeling that I’d managed to hold on to throughout the hardest part of the race was gone.  I just felt and still feel sad.

There are things I realize, like it’s only my 2nd marathon so I shouldn’t be so disheartened, and whatever my body’s been up to these last couple months with the HR was something that wasn’t going to magically disappear even if I did find the cause.  The worst part is this feeling of unease of what does it all mean? Where am I, fitness-wise?  Have I been fooling myself?  Was I pushing the workouts in a false way?  It’s painful to think of these things but to simply say “naaa” is just being an ostrich about it.

My immediate plan was to do like last year and spend the next few weeks playing around with 5K workouts and going for a new 5K PR, but I’m feeling so empty right now, like I can’t fight another fight, even if it’s only 3.1 miles. I feel like my training is one big question mark.  But I’ll get over it.  Glass half full, that’s me.

For my friends, I’m going to hibernate tonight, I don’t want to talk to anyone, so sorry for the unreturned messages and phone calls,  I know you get it.  You know what I hate though?  Is now you’re all going to be so sweet and do like I do when I read a crappy race report, be “great job considering you had to walk blah blah”.  But being on this end of it, I just feel a little pathetic about it.  So tell me I suck. It’ll make me feel better.

P.S. I want to say hi to Jhowdy, who I saw on the course looking fine, Christine, who was flying, Dave, who was also looking great, JoeShmoe who gave me a needed hug at around mile 23 and thank you Amy (my new self-appointed niece) who gave me the most incredible banana bread and some scented recovery salts in which I just took a long bath – they’re fantastic!  Plus all the wonderful BQ Babes: Kat and Audra (my personal race crew), Mir, Tara, Nina, Mary, Amy, Lynn, Jo, Caroline, Jo, Fran, mm64 (sorry for the name forgetting!) and their most excellent hubbies who managed to hang with the chicks and fit right in. Also, a shoutout to Robert, a fellow blogging pal I finally got to meet at the Expo.  What a cool culture, this running thing.

Edit: Lest you guys think I’m still in a funk, I’m not!!  I felt A-OK the next morning.  Read the next entry, Race Wrap Up for my thoughts on the whole thing.

Hey folks, back from the race which was tougher than expected though so much better than last year (guess anything would be) that I’m happy to at least have quashed the DNF dragon.

Yesterday:
I met up with Doggie girl and her girlfriend Loren for lunch and Expo persuing.  Once at the Expo, we hooked up with Kat (my Lehigh Valley Half roomy) so much socializing and fun anticipatory excitement.

Today – Race Day:
I live a short walk to the start, so I timed it to get into my corral with 10-15 minutes of wait time.  Temps for the start were 59 degrees and I was already wishing I’d worn just a sports bra on top, but since I was wearing my Gifted Runner shirt I didn’t have the heart to throw it away or want it flapping from the waistband of my shorts, so I kept it on.  I didn’t wear my HR monitor today, though I carried my small Amphipod with a gel in its pocket, which I ate at mile 8.

Gun goes off and I’m feeling ok but not at all speedy.  It never felt easy today but I told myself as the miles ticked by that if I wanted it to feel easy, I wouldn’t be racing.

Near the beginning a woman passed me and said she loved my shirt (PRs and Sunshine), so whore that I am, I pant out “giftedrunner.com… it’s my company”.  I’m such a ho for a buck.

Seemed like it took no time at all for my breathing to sound ugly, which always messes with my head.  I had to take occasional body checks to confirm I wasn’t on death’s door (Legs ok? Check.  Lungs ok?  Seems so, breathing 2 in, 2 out, just noisy as hell…).

My Garmin was off as always, plus I’d forgotten my pace band, so I wasn’t real sure of where I should be when.  As I’ve come to do in races these days, I kept the autolap on so I don’t have to hit Lap every mile, but as the beeps get earlier from the mile markers, I hit the lap button at some of the mile markers to re-calibrate the starting point.  That way I can add up those mini “laps” to their previous laps when I get home to have a more accurate picture.  That said, at the last few miles, I’m unable to press any buttons at all.

Splits went like this: 7:04, 7:03, 6:59, 7:01, 7:00, 7:07, 7:13, 7:14, 7:13, 7:20, 7:18, 7:09, 7:08 and the last .16 (Garmin’s deal, not mine) was 1:01 (Garmin thinks I ran 13.33).  Anyway, I kept wanting to count down the miles I had left but had to resist, making a deal that I couldn’t do that till mile 8, otherwise, it would seem interminable.

The Finish Line:
My finish was extremely uncomfortable.  I gave it my usual finishing kick which, in retrospect, I shouldn’t have even attempted because as I turned the final corner to the finish, my legs went wobbly (memories of Steamtown), so with the damn clock ticking down in front of my face, race goal already disappeared, I had no choice but to slow down my final few yards.  What a bugger.  I’m hoping the fake smile I put on made it to the cameras in time.

Final time:
1:33:51
6th in my AG and incidentally, oldest among those 6.   Note: I would’ve been 7th, but Doreen McCoubrie, a local 47-year old phenom is Elite, which is its own division…she came in at 1:20:30!  I swear, she’s Dorian Grey
Age grade 79.7%
134th female out of 6374
899th finisher out of 12,247

Yes, I’m disappointed,  because though I said sub 1:33 was my goal, I decided yesterday that what I really wanted to run was 7:00s.  So OK I got a PR, but not by enough, especially since the May Half was hilly and I’ve been working hard these past few months.

Moaning aside, the way I’m justifying it in my brain is that the May Half was my Spring goal race so I was tapered and sharp with all workouts pointed towards that one race.  But then, DA (Devil’s Advocate) says, “you kind of did taper this week because you had a day off on Monday then only ran 54 miles the whole week, including the race”.   To which I might reply, “well, my peak for the May Half was 72 miles and that’s been my average mileage these last couple months, so maybe I’m tired.  To which DA might reply “Higher weekly mileage? You should have been even faster“.  Fuck you, DA.

As for Dog and Kat, Doggie was hurting from mile 8, though still managed a healthy PR, so her report will be a tale from the Ouch.  Loren, who hardly runs anymore and never distance (an All-American in college, so a natural fastie) surprised herself with a 1:32:xx, the bitch. I hate to think what she’d do if given a few months of specific training.

Kat had the race we all dream about, she was planning on 1:47 but felt so good, she couldn’t help but run faster, ending up with a 1:45  and a 3 minute PR which bodes beautifully for Steamtown, which she’s running in 3 weeks.  She came to my new pad after the race for a shower and chatskies and on the way here we ran into Nick on the street.  That congratulatory hug made my day (hi Nick!! ).

Final thoughts:
If Philly was in a month, I’d be genuinely concerned, but with 8 weeks left and sharpening still to come, I’m not quite at “uh oh” level, but I’ll keep a clear eye on my progress from here on in.  I can’t afford to finish Philly in an ugly manner – it’ll determine my corral for Boston, so honesty is the best and only policy.

Really Final Thoughts:
Starting in a fast corral with all those men and just a sprinkling of gals (predominately younger than me) was a total trip and despite my whining, I’m beyond appreciative that I’m even allowed to participate alongside them.  So take my bitching with a grain of salt – I know I’m lucky as hell.

Oh, and NJGirl, if you’re reading this, I am sooo sad we didn’t get to meet, Kat and I hunted for you for awhile, but no luck.  Also, to that sweet blog reader who asked if I was Girl In Motion, you’ve been ordered to post a comment on here, so I’m holding you to it.

So I Lied Final Thoughts:
Nothing to say here, just being funny.  Later, kids.

This was my worst race all year, but I knew it would be as of last night at my friend Yvonne’s birthday party where I downed about 2/3 bottle of Pinot and ate till my tummy ached.  I managed to get to bed at 11:30 but had one of those drunken wake-up-at-3am scenarios where you never really get back to solid sleep.

Honestly, I would have bagged this race if I hadn’t already bagged the Media 5-miler a couple weeks ago because it was another hot one – sunny and 76 degrees.  But one of the benefits of having a blog is you have to do shit you’ve committed to, else you look like a big wuss to a ton of people.  That said, though it sucked time-wise, it was pretty entertaining in all other aspects.

The race goes around a sports arena, the Wachovia Center, home to the 76ers (the Philly basketball team, for those as sports-retarded as me).  It circles the arena and a large parking lot 2.5 times so it’s all on concrete sidewalks.  Half the course (around the perimeter of the parking lot) smells like piss, which makes you want to go faster, though I couldn’t, try as I might.

I knew it was going to be a difficult run during my warmup when my strides clocked a blistering 6:50.  Oh well, as I wrote in the Women’s BQ thread, I’m due a “fun run” so this was it.

For the bulk of the race, there was a young thing neck-and-neck with me and another woman right ahead of us.  There were also 2 girls ahead but not within my immediate area.  All I could manage was 6:55 mi, which on one hand was “omg, look how hard I suck”  but on the other hand, I just worried about these two others and fought for placing.

At 3/4 mile left to go, the one girl in front of me just plain gave up…stopped dead in her tracks.  That was fabu, though I totally understood the feeling and felt bad for her.  The neck-and-neck girl slowed down as well, so I beat her, too.

Cut to the chase, I won 3rd place OA with a 21:29. 1st and 2nd were a 19 and 20 year old (see how I make myself feel better for a cruddy race by blaming the youth of today?)

But the bounty!  Oh my, if I cared about basketball, I’d be in heaven.  As it is, Nick’s kids (one of whom is visiting from Oregon, the other lives in an apt. below) were like pigs in shit splitting up the booty.  Otherwise, I’d have put it all on Ebay.

The one thing I kept is a certificate for 2 Club Box tickets to a 76ers game this coming season – supposedly that’s pretty cool with waiter service and everything.  As for the rest, I got a ton of signed crap; 3 mini-basketballs, 2 framed photos, 3 hats, a t-shirt, a basketball jersey, a journal, playing cards, noisemaker, water bottle and a duffel bag to hold it all (cat not included).

So I had a fine time despite my silly finishing time.  In fact, I’m kind of happy that I finally had a “fun run” of a race.  Onward and upward, now I can concentrate on enjoying the rest of the summer, rebuilding my mileage and getting ready for marathon training in August.

Ciao darlings.  Until the next installment, run well everyone!

Because as Jim noted, the previous post wasn’t really a report, more like a glossing over, I’ll expand here.

The race itself was small, 300 people.  Weather was cloudy and 68 degrees with a dewpoint of 59.

Unlike my other races this season, I put no pressure on myself at all.  I kind of knew I’d get a PR because the weather was better than my last 5K, plus I know the course completely and I had my magic shoes.

My goal was to see something between 6:30-6:35s in the Garmin and that’s how it went down.  I was the third woman at the beginning, then I passed Christine (who I know from the park and this blog) which left some tiny 20-something wisp of a gal in front of me.

She was an odd duck because she came out of nowhere about 3/4′s of a mile in, passing me and zooming ahead.  I talked to her after the race and she said she likes to do the slow start.  She also likes humidity, told me it means there’s more oxygen in the air.  Doesn’t work for me, but good for her.

Anyway, during the race I was thinking how good it was that she was there (as with all the women I’m ever behind) because without them, I wouldn’t push so hard.  I kept her in my sights the whole time, knew I couldn’t pass her but just tried to keep the space between us as tight as I could for as long as I could.

I noticed as I ran that for the most part my breath was 2:2, so I knew I was doing alright.  I tend to pay attention to these things now as it’s a barometer of how hard I’m working.  Not sure when my breath went 1:1, somewhere around the last half mile.

My Garmin autolap splits were right on with the first two mile markers which doesn’t happen too often.  You go under some overpasses so the Garmin tends to get wonky at those places (which I’ve just realized today after overlaying two races on the same course), but my Garmin splits were:
6:34,6:34,6:29, and though the last bit doesn’t come out right, Garmin shows me kicking in at 6:01 to finish.

As far as socializing, as mentioned, Audra’s girlfriend Loren was there with Bea the dog, Audra’s mom came with her nephews, also their friend and friend’s kid, plus my friend Yvonne showed up, so with Judy there too, it was quite a little party.

So looking to Friday evening, I really want to race it now because I’m feeling great off yesterday’s effort, but the weather looks like crap at this point, 77 degrees with dewpoint of 62 (exactly what I had for my last 5K) so unless that changes, I’m not going to drive out there for a tempo run.

And that’s it from race central for the moment.  Must get the website finished up today…

Later, loves.

Now we’re talking! 20:25 pour moi today. I came in 2nd OA (alas, no 2nd OA award, so 1st AG). Shout out to Christine (hi girl!) who came in right behind me.

The race was a blast because Judy of the Women’s BQ thread was in town and ran it, as did Audra who came down from NYC with her girlfriend Loren the night before and stayed over at my house.  Judy, Audra and I each placed in different age categories, so between us we had the 30-59 year range covered. Audra and I got 1st AG and Judy got 2nd.  Good times, good times.

My racing flats were the bomb, really comfortable with no hot-spots, leaving me happily satisfied with that anxiety-tinged purchase.  I’ve put them back on their sacred spot atop my digital scanner, the better to adore their aqua prettiness without having to turn my head.

So this race gives me an Age-Grade score of 79.91%, eeking even closer to “National Class” than my previous highest score from the last 10K (78.37%).  I know, I know…it means absolutely nothing, but it’s fun.

Coming up…I’ve got a 5-mile race this Friday at 7pm in a town about 30-minutes away, but I might bag it.  I’m only doing it to get my 5-mile PR in line with the latest, so if the weather looks eh or I’m feeling eh, I’ll have no qualms skipping it.  Then there’s another 5K the week after that, a weird one where you run around a stadium a couple times.  Sounds stupid but that’s also why it sounds fun.

Also, I’m just about to announce The Gifted Runner’s Grand Re-opening which has consumed me completely these last few weeks.  Despite the endlessly irritating aspect of having to remake everything (much bigger pain in the ass than you’d imagine) it’s been fun being creative again and thinking up new stuff.

I always end up having a great time coming up with new stuff, but when I think about thinking up stuff, I get worried I’ll think of stupid stuff so I end up not thinking about anything except the fact that I’m avoiding thinking about coming up with new stuff.  It’s a drag.

This has been my M.O. for the past year.

The only way around this is to do more, think less – design without the need for it to always be great, allow some schlock, but just keep producing and get out of my head more; not an easy task for a self-critical, anti-social hermit such as myself.  Let’s see how long this lasts…

Kicking it in, eyes on the finish line.

Some race observations:

I’m at the start, standing by these two women, when I overhear them talking about the weather so I butt in and ask how it will change their race.  One of them (who won #1 in my AG with a 19:43) tells me to expect 30sec. to 1-min slowdown.   Then I asked do you start with that in mind or does your body tell you what to do, they said, “oh, your body will set the pace.”  I already expected a slowdown but hearing it could be 1 whole minute freaked me out some.   At that point, I had no idea what to expect but knew I was going to start about 10 seconds slower than originally planned.

At about 1.5 miles in, I end up by some guy who says, “Mind if I hang off you?”  I said “sure”, but then in 3 more steps I was already ahead of him and gone.  That’s when I realized I was passing people en masse.

Looking at my splits, I see my 2nd mile was 10 seconds slower but for no real reason, there weren’t any hills to speak of.  I think that was a mixture of me being afraid of pushing in case I died a premature hot death and what’s turning into my usual 2nd mile silliness where I tend to lose attention and get whiney.

But the kicker was my HR (I wore the strap but had the info hidden so I had no idea what it was through the race).  It was low. Lower than the 3mile tempo I’d done the week before at 10k pace.  I averaged 86%HRR, maxed at 92.  This is mildly disturbing to me, because if anything, it should have averaged in the 90s, either because of the heat or the 5K effort, not to mention both.  A RW forumite, Amuse, whose opinions I respect completely, thinks it’s because heat and humidity don’t allow you to get up to optimal racing intensity, which sounds sensible, though the previous week’s tempo does leave a question mark.

I’m finally understanding that HR info is almost ethereal in that there’s no tried and trueness to it.  I still find it incredibly useful, but realize there is no magic key that will tell me when A happens, B will result.  I can live with that.

Nick gets laid:

Nick said something later that afternoon that was so hot, I had to do him.  He said, “Your gait, or whatever you call it, has changed a lot since the last time I saw you race.  You’re not hunched over like you used to be.”  YES, YES, YEEEESSSS!!  As someone who’s had crappy posture forever, running or otherwise, all the pushups and chinups these past months have made quick work of straightening me up.  The last time he saw me race was December, so this was music to my ears.

My form in general has changed a lot without me realizing it (though the heelstrike looks here to stay).  I used to wonder why some runners barely move their arms, it looks weird to me, but apparently I am one of them now.  In looking at the photos he took, I see my arms don’t have much of a swing, which is fine and dandy – as long as I’m getting faster, I don’t care what they do.  One thing I did notice on today’s run though, is that they are definitely driving from the elbows which is what the books and coaches say to do, but that I could never manage to integrate purposely.  It’s cool to find this happens naturally now.

Beyond the race:

Yesterday was a lovely 9-miler, then today was a not-so-lovely 11.3.  I started out planning to run 9 but it was cool and beautiful (light rain) so I made my turnaround at 6 to make it 12.  With 4 miles to go I got this weird pain in my leg which I ran through, but eventually had to stretch.  Finally, I ended up walking the last .75.  I’ve walked home maybe 4 times ever.  It feels fine now though, so hopefully it was just a ghost.  My shoes are at 340 miles, so maybe that didn’t help, either.

My business dilemma/hell:

And now, the real pain in my ass, which I haven’t mentioned on here though it’s been a dark cloud for over a month.  Cafepress, the company I use to make and send my t-shirts, is changing something in their business model which screws all us shopkeepers out of $ starting June 1st.  I’ve been paralyzed to do anything about it because it takes forever to create products, which I’ll have to do all over again with another fulfillment company.

So I’ve been freaking out how to handle it, where to start, whether the running shirts or music shirts or scuba, etc.  After going back and forth about the best way to proceed, I finally started recreating some products last week, but I hate it, I can’t stand redoing old projects and this is sheer drudgery that’ll take weeks to complete.

On the other hand, I’ve been terrible with business this whole year, spending my every thought on running and letting all my websites languish – so in a way, this has blessing properties, as it’s making a return to creativity very inviting, at least as an alternative to this shit work.  I might just leave a lot of designs on Cafepress and concentrate on new stuff, but it’s just a mess since pricing structures will be different for each company.  Aargh!  There’s really no good answer to it at all.

If there is a silver lining, it’s that the new company offers wicking shirts, so I can finally sell running shirts that runners can actually run in.  Woohoo, what a concept.

And that concludes this epic post.  I need peanut butter.